I have been on yet another journey in the past few weeks since I have written last. In the past month I made my journey to my “home village” as they would call it in Malawi to ….America! As the anticipation began I kept telling myself to stay calm and not get overwhelmed. When I told people here that I was going home to visit they seem upset. Though this is somewhat flattering yet upsetting because they thought if I went back home I would see “glorious America” and never come back to Malawi. I tried to assure them that it was just to see my family, loved ones and friends but they were not convinced. Other volunteers warned me of the ‘hangover’ after coming back to America. So all of this at the same time as my grant arrived J was a bit overwhelming. The saying when it rains it pours is so true. I remember during the rainy season while I was still in the transition of moving to my house and waiting for the end of the rains to start my projects almost questioning my purpose here. But alas, when the rains finished and I moved into my house things were moving at light speed. There are two things I learned about this rainy season. It’s amazing to see a landscaped totally transformed by water! Everything was so beautiful and colorful. There was an abundance of veggies and fruit. Also this was the first time I really had time to reflect upon my first year in Malawi. Now I have been told that this was this season was not a good season as the rains started too late while finishing too quickly. There are some with nothing to harvest and others having crops that just stopped in the middle of their prime growing. What to do? As in Malawi, you just go on in life and have faith that all will be well.
They last few days before I went home many people visited me and gave me some small remembrances. I ate as much Nsima as I could and ate at many people’s houses J Then when I was in Lilongwe the capital, I received carvings from friends as remembrance (as they were still under the impression that they needed to convince me to come back to Malawi) that I was able to give as gifts. Coming home was wonderful. I was met with a great welcome of my husband and our family dog. For the past 5 years I have been with a dog that is like my child, who I left to go to Malawi. I was slightly worried that she wouldn’t remember me. At first she sniffed at my feet and when she realized who I was she went crazy (one of my best moments home). Then America! I was slightly overwhelmed by the wealth and choices when I came home. But then I found my happy place, the local co-op where I felt at home again. I must say I felt out of place. For the past 14 months America kept on going on as to no surprise, while I kept growing in Malawi. It was awesome to see my friends and family, but at the same time I kept feeling that feeling of my heart was in Malawi. We have so much, which is a blessing yet I still feel the guilt. After a week things seemed so familiar and I felt at ease. Saying good-bye was tough but I felt so much love in those 2 weeks I was so grateful.
Coming back I felt a slight hangover from America and coming back to the village as well. But by the 2nd and 3rd day all was well. I guess I’ve been too busy to even think about it. Also I’ve had great things happen when I arrived. I must give you background. I used to worry that one day when I leave nothing will be sustained and that the work I asked to be done wouldn’t be done. Yet in most cases things worked themselves out naturally. And things that didn’t need to work out or shouldn’t (as my boss says) it died a natural death J so progress so far this year. We have completed home based care training for community volunteers, started working hard in the communities to find those that are chronically ill to receive help and resources available to them. The beginning stages of youth friendly services from the hospital. Started some pad projects in the community. This is for young girls who are unable to go to school during their menstruation because of a lack of sanitary pads. So I and my counterpart have begun teaching women and girls to make their own with cloth. Next I will be doing natural medicine training for the support groups to help them start their own gardens in their communities to use for immune systems and nutrition. Along with many other things I think I will have a lot in my next year. But in general I must say I’m just feeling so grateful that I have the opportunity to do these projects. I once was telling someone. The projects themselves don’t need a lot of help from me, unless I write a grant. Most of it is me being there to encourage the people. The sense of community has always been here they just need a reminder at times. My friend says the biggest steps we take are the ones we can’t see ahead of us. But I feel like most of the developing is happening in me. I’m learning to be patient, actively listen and be easy. There are times when we want to just get to the point or correct, but I’m learning to sit back and wait. Either things that are supposed to happen will happen or ‘it will die a natural death’. I’ve learned to listen to nature as she is always there to teach us a lesson. Example:
Aisha: I’m feeling so overwhelmed
Mother Nature: You need to rest.
Aisha: but I only have so much time
Mother Nature: Time is relative
Aisha: so what to do?
Mother Nature: You’ve planted your seeds so see after the rainy season which ones will sprout
Aisha: OOOOhhhh I see, but as a human being I have a short memory so I will need reminders.
Mother Nature: I’ll be here just look around and listen
So you may think after this I have gone crazy….but it’s just a metaphor of course. I only talk to the trees on really bad days…. (Sarcasm).
So I must give a shot out to all the wonderful people who helped me have a wonderful time while I was home and your continued love and d support. I will try my best!
Funny story time:
So when I first moved into my house I had a really bad time with termites. I have a great house that I love and appreciate, yet it was not maintained to the best of its ability. So when I moved in I used a mixture of many different chemicals to keep my ‘security guard’ as my friend says. Yet they always come back! My first night consisted of them welcoming me by crawling in my bed and me not sleeping. After many attempts to rid myself I asked my friend Emily what to do. “It’s just the season” she says. So I guess I have to let it go. What would a Buddhist do? “Find ways to not invite your security guards in”. I guess it will just have to die a natural death J
No comments:
Post a Comment