Maluwa-Wamwalira

In Malawi there are many instances that you must be culturally appropriate no matter how much of an “Azungu” (a foreigner) that you are…A Maluwa or funeral is one of these occasions. Maluwa is coincidentally the same word for flower. There are many interesting things at a Malawian funeral looking at it from cultural stand point. I will try my best to describe the events and cultural practices of the mourning process in Malawi. When someone dies there is a mourning ceremony at the house of the deceased with family. The women sit with the women in a room together while they cry or wail the whole day until midnight. The men sit separately while chatting and mourning. You walk into the room with your hands behind your back to show concern and respect. You greet the most senior woman that is mourning and send your condolences. You then sit and sing songs with them for at least for an hour to show respect. The next day is a daylong of mourning and ceremonies. You mourn at the hospital or wherever the body is by sitting as the women cry and even the men as well. People bring cloth for the woman to wear, but nothing is required for you to bring. Just your presence and concern is enough. There is a committee of women who come to support women in the event of a death. But the crying is not always followed by tears but with a loud distinguishable wailing. The sound of a mother crying for her child that has died of malaria is one that cuts through your soul. They then cook Nsmia in huge Mpikas (large clay pots) and sing even more beautiful hymns. Then they proceed with a church ceremony with more crying and wailing while the priest gives a sermon. But in between you see the woman laughing and making jokes. It is interesting to see how quickly the emotions can change. Finally you proceed to take the body to the grave yard. The interesting thing about grave yards is that you always no one once you can distinguish one. In a country with a big problem of deforestation it is the only place where there are a lot of trees. It is bad and forbidden to take trees from the graveyard. The body is laid to rest and family members place flowers hence the coincidence of flowers and funeral as the same word. Then you go home and move on. It seems that in America we don’t really mourn like they do in Malawi. In this ceremony processes you grieve get it all out and then you move on. It’s not held inside and reserved it’s all there for you too seen and feels. Who and I to say which one is the best.

Living the green life

In America we are obsessed with living green as much as possible now. But here I do so because it’s the path of least resistance. Every drop of water I use I have to carry so you can imagine how that makes you really appreciate water. They say here “Madzi ndi Moyo” which means water is life. IT truly is. If there isn’t enough water your crops fail, your harvest fails and you may not be able to feed your family for the year. If you don’t have enough water you are forced to take water from unsafe places which can put you life in danger. I find myself collecting rain water that I can use to wash my dishes to then use for my garden. My water that I bathe with is also used for my garden. If I make a charcoal fire I use every bit of the charcoal to heat something that I may need at the moment or for tomorrow. I use a solar charger and keep it charged along with all my electronics in the event (which usually happens every day for at least 3 hours) that there is a blackout. My remains that are appropriate are used for my compost which in turn I use for my garden which in turn provides me with nutrition. I find myself only using and taking exactly what I need and not more. This is not done because I struggle as much as the average Malawian does but because I have a better respect for resources that I use now. Have you ever tasted fresh beans taken from the pods? Village rice is the best. But it only the best if you have to pick out the rocks! Walking outside my house to find vegetables that just grow everywhere during the rainy season. It’s nice finding food right outside your porch. Life is good during the rainy season! Oh and it just finished raining and we saw the most beautiful double rainbow. Whenever I worry or get sad I just look outside and God always says in his own way that….everything is going to be alright. Or as a peace corps volunteer once said I just outside and let Africa find me.

29 years!

Today is my birthday. Which among all things is a day to celebrate. It means at the end of the day I have been lucky enough to be on this earth for another year. This last year has been one full of tremendous challenges, life changing moments and incredible growth. Last year at this time I was having a surprise party before I left for Malawi. All my family, friends and loved ones gathered to wish me well on my journey. At that moment I had no idea what was in store for me. I say if you really want to get to know yourself, go half way around the world were you don't know anyone. live with a family where you barely know the language. Learn a culture and history that is not your own but really is your own because it's he cradle of human beings. All of this and more will make you feel more alive than you have ever felt before. But I must warn you. When you do so it will come with the most realist emotions you have ever felt. If you are not careful you could be overwhelmed. But if you look at the situation just right, you will find the gal for growth. You will the opportunity to do the right thing. You will find the opportunity to step outside yourself and really decide who you are. Most importantly, in all the chaos you will find beauty. Like when you hear a jazz song that seems chaotic, yet suddenly you hear the harmony and don't realize how you miss it his whole time. For those moments I am grateful. I'm grateful for the peace that it brings me. I'm grateful for the good people in my life who support me from thousands of miles away. I'm grateful for the good moments that I enjoy because I have waited for them. I'm grateful that even though I may not be in a place of abundance, some how I always have what I need. Finally I am grateful for my health that has allowed me to make this journey while still maintaining my stride. So yes this is a lot. But it is my life in a nutshell. Most importantly I  grateful for you the reader who cares enough about me to read my story. So thanks!

Tis the season

Tis the season

This is the season for many things in Malawi. Everything stands still as the rainy season brings life to the dusty Malawi scenery. What was once brown is now green. Where there was nothing in the garden. If untamed in weeks you have a jungle. I had neglected my beloved garden while I was away on holiday and traveling a lot in the past couple months. I was surprised to see my garden full of things that I don’t remember planting or even plants that I didn't sow seeds. But it is a beautiful time of year when people are busy in their gardens and farms to hopefully have a good harvest. If you don’t plant, don’t have a good harvest you and your family may go hungry. It is latterly life or death. People are busy with little food to eat. What do you say to a person who is your friend who says, “l haven’t eaten in three days”. Not to be dramatic but it is just life here this time of year. You see the babies getting weighed this time of year and see their weights decreasing. What do you say? To Malawians they just say “Tis the season”. So much abundance during this time but the biggest staple crop, maize is yet to be harvested. If people don’t eat Nsima made from Maize, they go hungry. So as I may complain on trivial things of not having enough money sometimes or projects taking a long time to get started; the real issue remains, did I eat? Most days yes! Even with hunger comes generosity. Yes they may not have food, but they will always invite you to the little you have. Things are interesting this time a year. As this whole country is based economically still on agriculture, everything slows down as we wait for the harvest.  Will the rains bring enough water to make a good harvest? Let’s only pray.

Home sweet Home

It’s funny how quickly you can call a place a home. I have been in Malawi now for 9 months but I consider Malawi my home. I am now returning from my trip from the Republic of South Africa (RSA) feeling well rested and motivated. Not to mention this was the first time I have seen my husband in 9 months J the last few months have been full of many triumphs and challenges as to be expected in Malawi. Highlights include: the opening of 2 under 5 clinics in two villages that I helped supervise and organize the community. I don’t feel as though this is an accomplishment of my own but one of the community. I just stood by, motivated, gave instructions, organized the community with the help of my colleagues and brought supplies. My other accomplishment was the of motivating the communities to start medicinal gardens in their gardens. I hope in the future I can use these as I have successfully motivated others in the communities to start in hopes that they will motivate other individuals in their villages. I have cooked Nsima (the staple food of Malawi) by myself, not to mention many of the times where I missed one step turning my Nsima to mush. Or not to mention when it wasn’t quite right and tried to serve it to my fellow Malawians, they politely made rice J but finally with the supervision of my Amayi (my village mother) I succeeded!  I also successfully killed my first chicken: / I felt as if I at chicken I should at least be able to kill it. My friend came to my house one day and said hey I brought you something it’s behind the seat. I went to go look and to my surprise and slight yelp, it was a chicken. Beautiful matured female chicken. I asked what should I do with it? He replied “eat it!” I knew at that moment what the fate of this young chicken. I like to name my chickens so I feel that I can have a humane dialogue with it before I decide its fate. As we have seen from the past I don’t always have the best luck with chickens….Amayi Mazira (mother of eggs who was stolen in the night…etc.) But I decided that I just had to get it over with. I put on my rain boots, chitenje (fabric worn around a woman’s waist) and grabbed the sharpest knife I could find. I explained to her that I’m sure she was a nice bird but, I was hungry and so were my friends. I gathered my friends to coach and assist me to make it as quick as possible. Not to be too graphic but it was quick and nice (if that is possible). That was the easiest part I soon discovered. You must de-feather it and then butcher it. I tried my best to assist my friend but was not of much help. We cooked it and when dinner was ready. I just sort of starred at it and unsatisfying ate my meal. Two weeks later a nice man from the village gave me another chicken. I gave this one as a gift to my friends. And when they asked what part I wanted I declared that I was working on being a vegetarian again. I must back up and explain how I got the chicken. There is an NGO called Heifer International which gives milking cows to HIV families to help supplement their incomes. Because HIV/AIDS is a debilitating disease, despite ARVs (which sometimes cause the worst side-effects) there are many IGA (income generating activities) to help these families. If you are too sick to farm, then you don’t eat in Malawi pretty much. So I went around with the NGO to look at their progress and see the cows. I came across this young milking cow. These cows were like the cows of India. They were not just livestock they were prized possessions that were the very livelihood of these families. This cow looked into my eyes, licked my hand and like my family dog asked with the nod of its head for affection. This too has also influenced my 2^nd thought to become a vegetarian… I hope to also work with this organization as much as possible in the future. My challenges aren’t important because my successes outweigh to the point where they become insignificant.

But I do feel like Malawi is my home, and my village as my hometown. I missed little things while I was having an incredible time with my husband. Listening to Chichewa, woman selling mangos on every corner, the lack of structure (I know it sounds crazy). I didn’t realize how much of a Malawian I was until I was late to the bus going back to Malawian when this South African woman was so upset because I arrived 2 minutes to departure. In Malawi 1) I would have been early 2)instantly met with a smile 3) instantly forgiven .There are down sides to these cultural norms, but I know at least now I have assimilated. With the rains the landscape has changed to a beautiful green as everything comes to life! The corn is growing, mangoes falling from the trees and everyone hard at work to make a good harvest. This is a vast change to my morning routine during the dry season as they days were also shorter.  In the village I awake to the rooster crow, do my daily chores and water my garden looking up at my papaya tree to see the moon and stars at 5am. Now I can be a little bit lazier. I don’t need to heat my bathing water ( it’s too hot), I don’t have to water my garden  ( the rains do it for me), this gives me an extra 1hr to sleep inJ so now I wake up at 430 or 5 instead of 330 or 4.

RSA was beautiful. It was like being in America, Europe and a little bit of Africa smashed into one. I didn’t want to do much. Just eat good food, go for nice hiking (table Top Mountain, which is 6 times older than the Himalaya’s) and catch up on movies missed in an actual movie theatre. I missed the sound of the rooster in the morning, the rooster crowing, the smell of the landscape after it rains, the Malawian music (that they play over and over again on the mini buses), greetings of everyone wherever I go, the smiles of the people and the happiness of the children (even though they have nothing, maybe didn’t eat much that day and are playing with plastic bags as a toys). Those are the unexpected things that are etched into your heart that become part of you. I look in the mirror and see my history and am very proud of my heritage. I see my mother’s family who came to a land from Germany to escape religious persecution or maybe to seek a better life. I see the picture of their lives that they made in the Midwest as farmers. The land the sweated and tilled so their children could have a better life. Or my father’s family who struggled to make a best life on the West coast of Africa in Ghana. Did my ancestors know that they would have a distant relative who would travel to Africa and live again? Did my blonde hair blue eyed ancestors know that they would have a brown skinned, curly hair relative. The interesting thing about RSA is there are people that are of every color and nationality. But because their families have been there for so many generations and they are mixed with so many ethnicities it’s hard to tell they ethnicities. During the apartheid there were many different classifications for race and ethnicity, which I understand now. But after almost 20 years of the end to the apartheid you see the need for importance slowly fading away. If you ask a South African what is your race, the smile (because they know this kind of still matters in America) and say “I’m South African”. Enough said. In America as a bi-racial child dealing with so many identify issues growing up; coming here has given me peace to this issue. I’m not a black American or a half-cast as they call me sometimes in Malawi (out of ignorance). I am an American.

I have a really good fellow Peace Corps volunteer named Charlie. He is in his 60’s and is one of the most interesting people I have ever met. He is among the population PCVs who decided that after a life of working and public service that he should again contribute to public service in the developing world. Every now in then we send each other deep text about our experiences and he always gives me good advice just like a good father would. He always seems to know what I’m thinking just my real father would and gives me the best encouragement. So the other day he sent me an email about comfort zones. I know I have talked about how it’s important to be ‘comfortable being uncomfortable’. Now as a PCV I have it pretty easy compared to my peers. I have electricity most of time, running water and a great supervisor who is motivated and keeps me busy. But now and again I have these ‘hiccups’ as she calls them where things become uncomfortable. The other day I had a issue with my housing of what I won’t go into detail. But let’s just say I’m safe but was made to feel uncomfortable. And at that time I received Charlie’s email. He was talking about how as it seems as soon as he became comfortable, it was time for something new. Which is true. But as I began to feel sorry for myself I received an inspirational talk from my supervisor which was much needed. My supervisor is one of the coolest people ever by the way. She is a sister and a doctor, I know right?! But she is highly motivated and helps so many people. Whenever I feel as though I need inspiration I go and work with her for a day and know what it really means to serve your community and people. To live a life of service. I read a good quote one time that stated, 'a good teacher doesn’t just tell how, she lets you stand beside her to see the way’. I really feel that way with her. I feel like I have learned so much since being here, more than I can ever give back. I wake up everyday knowing that there may be challenges, but knowing that I’m serving my life’s purpose. And for that I’m grateful. So I’m gearing up for my project, so I’ll ask for your prayers. Its research in anemia in under 5 children. During the rainy season there are 2 factors that contribute to anemia. The rainy season is called the hunger season and malaria season. It is before corn can be harvested to make Nsima (the staple food) so they run out of food before harvest. Also with rain, comes mosquitoes, which in turn brings malaria which also  causes anemia. With these two factors children can come in to the hospital almost dead or sometimes they do die because of severe anemia. We hope to go into some of the communities this year to introduce plants that are found here than help with anemia. Some call it natural medicine, supplement or locally available plants. Either way we hope to help make a small impact so these children can have healthy lives, have good cognitive development, and healthy immune systems.

So funny story time as there is a new American here volunteering and apparently my other Malawian roommate is afraid I have become the scorpion killer and/or other pest. The other day I heard the American screaming, Aisha please come in here and get rid of this thing. I guess this time of you is when the lizards come out and I think they are cute. I remember during training when I lived in the village there was a frog always in my room. So here’s how it works if you think about it all the time they can sense it and follow you everwhere..hahaha. So every morning I would sweep out the frog but at night I would look over with my lamp and be looking deeply into the eyes of my friend who I named KermitJ So finally I gave up on kicking him out and told him one night, I won’t bother you and you eat all the bugs in my room. And that was it. So I tried to explain this to the American with not much success. So we just chased him out. But he always seems to find her no matter what. Then there are the big scorpions, which are kind of scary. So when one appears, I’m usually the one designated to kill it which I feel bad, because I think it’s bad karma. But the worse part is the horrible noise and mess it makes when I squash such a big bug. So I am a PCV/herbalist /pest controller. Also there other I spent about 10 minutes chasing a chicken out my house as it came into my roomJ Maybe it came for the scorpions. Nevertheless I’m just glad it didn’t poop in my house. Ah another day in Malawi…Love it!

"American"

I remember growing up and not sure what it really felt like to be an American. Not really feeling as though I was the typical American. I grew up in with many different cultures and felt as though to have this experience made me different. It wasn't until I started traveling that I realized the true 'American' culture. Furthermore it wasn't until I had a new American volunteer placed at my site that I realized how American I was. I know that I have talked about the guilt that I felt of all the advantages I have as an American but I also must add something else. I am truly proud to be American. Though I am sometimes frustrated with all the injustices that I see in America, overall I am grateful for the progress with we have made over the last 200 something years. We have our problems but in general things run a little bit smoother than in developing countries. We are individualist, we speak out if we don't agree, and for the most part we aren't afraid of change. It is these qualities I believe that have allowed us to be where we are today. I must say I am not the most patriotic person and at times I was almost embarrassed to say I was American. But now I see that we may do some things I don't agree with I am very blessed to raised in America. I don't have to worry about my parents marrying me off at the age of 14. In America for the most part: I don't have to worry about if I have safe drinking water. I don't have to worry about speaking out against the government. There are so many things that I am grateful for in America. But most of all I'm proud of what my ancestors endured in both continents of Africa and Europe to come to America for a better life. The other day I had to explain the political and historical context that has lead Malawi to be the way it is. In general it has to do with the political history that has lead to slow development. That is not to say that I am not happy to be here. I love Malawi for so many reasons and love my work. I just ask that in the future we can help developing countries with development and not aid. I always say to myself baby steps or ' you may plants seeds and not see the harvest, but that doesn't mean it's not growing'. And then my favorite, my sort of mantra that I think of everyday for myself and others, “Be prepared at any moment to change who you are, to become the person you will be".

When we first arrived in Malawi we were taken to a place called Dedza. Dedza is not like most of Malawi. It is mountainous and very very cold (considering misconceptions of what African weather should be like). But nevertheless, we stayed here during our first 2 months here in Malawi. We lived with a host family in the village for a month and in between that time stayed at a Forestry College. Then after swearing in, we all left for our site finishing what is called PST ( Pre-service Training). Now 6 months later in country ( wow can’t believe it’s been 6 months, time flies here) we are back at college for our IST ( Introduction Service Training) we love our acronyms! On one of the first mornings we all climbed to the top of a small mountain to watch the sun rise. Around here there are wild dogs that live mostly off our leftover food. There is one who is the leader of the pack called ‘snail butt’ there are two reason for this: one his tail curls like a snail and two yes your right he has a parasite. But regardless he is healthy and a good dog. Every time we go up the mountain he accompanies us to the top. He doesn’t really know us that much but knows that we are different from the others. Most Malawians are not always nice to dogs ( this is not to say that some Malawians have dogs as pets and treat them very nicely) but there is a reason for this. Sometimes they become rabid and attack people so I get why there is a slight fear of animals. But anyways, we get to the top of this mountain and watch the sun rise over the mountainous, tree rich, cool area of Malawi. I remember thinking for the first time that pine trees was not what I envisioned in Africa. When the British came to Malawi they wanted trees for building houses and the like that were straight. Because Dedza has a cool climate pine trees grew here successfully and are now very common. But regardless it is beautiful here and partly because it was our first home here. I went back to see my host family and they were excited. My little sister just started Secondary School which is like high school in America. This is a big deal for girls as a lot of times get married young and don’t finish school. As incentive I decided to pay half of her school fees to encourage her to take school seriously. My little brother had Malaria some time back and lost a lot of weight. I here these stories everyday of someone getting Malaria, getting married young, parents dying leaving orphans and other common diseases here. They seem real to you until someone you know is effected and then you feel a slight feeling of guilt. I know that I didn’t come here to save all of Malawi or the world for that case. But it’s not to say that I don’t take this job very seriously to not end all morbidity or moralities, but to maybe, hopefully lessen the suffering of the average Malawian especially the children. I had a dream last night that I was back in America in my mom’s home. I had all the modern conveniences that I was used to back in the states. It was funny because the whole time I felt uncomfortable. It was always interesting to me once I realized how the majority of the world was living as a child that I felt this feeling of guilt. Like why did God choose me to be the lucky one who would get to live in a developing country with less suffering ( I’m talking health, infrastructure and human rights). But I also didn’t take it lightly. Time to do some work!